Saturday, 3 January 2009

Making Plans

I have got the New Year off to a good start by attending the party. The next night i hopped into the car and drove with Gerry to my brothers for dinner. I was a little anxious as we had thick fog, but as the drive takes only 5 minutes i was soon indoors again. We had a lovely dinner and it was great to spend time with my brother, his girlfriend and my nephews in a different environment. Again, it has messed with my head a little that it was so easy and that I was so comfortable. I try not to think about this too much though as i imagine that's where the negative thoughts could kick in. So i am trying to just enjoy these new experiences. We were there for a couple of hours and i honestly could have stayed longer but we headed home for a night with a DVD. Also in the past week i have been to the shops twice on my own. This is something i could do about a year ago but i want it to become very regular again. I had to wait in large queues both times and although I wasn't exactly comfortable, i coped OK.
I don't know what I will be doing from day to day or what challenges i want to face next but all i know is that i am up for at least attempting things which, as you know, is not like me. The one thing I REALLY want to do is make an appointment at the dentist. I never thought for a second I would be doing this. My teeth are a mess! I know i must need at least 6 removed and a lot of cosmetic work done too. To be honest the cosmetic work is my priority at the moment. I have a hole behind my front tooth which has left the tooth looking discoloured. I have been living with it for years but it looks like the tooth is about to give up the fight and crumble. I can't believe that i may once again be able to smile with confidence! I know i can drive to the dentist as it is within my comfort zone, but i think i will struggle with the process once i get out of the car. The waiting room, the dentist chair, the dentist.... this is all new and may be a bit too much. And on top of that I will have to sit there for about half an hour and let them do the work!!! It seems very hard to imagine that i would be able to do this but also i know that if i do, I will feel totally fantastic. I know that if i wanted to i could get medication for this. I have been offered Valium/Xanax in the past when attending the dentist but i don't really want to go down that road. However i am actually just impressed with the fact that I am even considering this! How things change. I called the dentist to make the appointment today but it was closed so i will be calling them on Monday. I will let you know how it goes.


diver said...

I find the dentist one of the hardest tests. It's just so claustrophobic and invasive. And it usually means weeks sometimes months of having appointments 'hanging' over me' grrr, drives me nuts.

I can only suggest you fight your way through this one with all the determination and self-reliance that you Capricorns are supposedly famous for. On the bright side you'll end up saving yourself future dental pain; and of course will score the perfect smile for those wedding photos! That should be pretty strong motivation to push yourself through the experience, eh?

All the best with it Lynn!

Jason said...

I don't know if I mentioned this before, but I've had to have some dental work done over the last year or so. I won't lie and say it's easy, but it also wasn't as bad as I imagined it.

it's just like everything else. You think it's going to get all crazy and you won't be able to cope, but you find a way and make it through just fine.

Good luck!

Robert said...

So today's the day you make your dental appointment.... I'm sure it'll be ok - you're doing so well now!

Best wishes.