Monday, 24 March 2008

Latest News & Free Linden Method

I wish i could come on here sounding happy and positive all the time but i guess that isn't reality is it.

I haven't been out. I have been spending A LOT of time in my room, on my own. When i wake in the morning i go grab some cereal and coffee and return straight to my room. It's where i am most comfortable, and it's where i am surrounded by the things i need, i.e my laptop and mobile phone. I can sit there all day, untill i go get dinner and then its back to my bedroom on my own unless i'm seeing my boyfriend.

This has been happening for a while and it started to get to me. I realised i NEEDED to get back out. I began to obsess thinkin... Oh no thats me back to being housebound, Is this me getting worse, am i never going to feel strong enough to tackle this.

So i made myself sit in the garden the next day. I wasnt there for long really but i think i just needed to prove to myself that i am not scared of being there. The next day my friend came round and when she left i decided to walk her home a little. I didnt get far, only about 5 minutes away when it started to pour with rain, and since i had no jacket i just headed for home.

I felt proud in having done it. But the negative thoughts are still there. I feel a knot in my stomach telling me i am not doing enough. On the other hand i tell myself that it wont ever get too bad because i clearly get to a stage where i MAKE myself get up and do something...anything. So i am having this little battle of postives and negatives a lot at the moment.

Obviously my problems are due to agoraphobia but i also think i am basically just stuck in rut! I have NO routine. I dont do anything outside my home. So its difficult to force myself to go out and do something different. My life is an indoor one. And i am perfectly happy that way. BUT i realise this life isnt for me. I want to be out socialising, shopping etc so this needs tackled. I have called my doctor to be re-referred to the commuinity psychiatric nurse for CBT and Graded Exposure. I think the graded exposure is basically what i need most.

Also i have a friend who is a nurse and she is now being trained in EMDR. This is the therapy i have been most interested in trying out. The women herself told me she watched a man performing EMDR for a few days in his surgery and she was blown away by the results. Now that she herself is training i am going to be her first patient. It could work or it could fail but what harm is there in trying? Her training will be rather long so it could be the end of the year before she is qualified to work with me. The women whose name is Alison is a nurse at present and she is interested in learning all sorts of therapies and she seems to have a genuine interest in how i am doing. She called the other night i and i explained i have been shutting myself away again and she has offered to come and go out walking with me. This is a great help. I am helping Alison gain experience in working with people with phobias and i feel better doing that than asking my friends or my mum all the time.

An online friend told me about a website she had found called The website offers a recording that can be sent to you at a small fee. Like most of these sites there are statements on there from previous users who claim the cds have helped them to deal with their anxiety. My friend bought the CDs and sent them straight on to me. I would like to offer anyone who is interested in recieving the CD to get in touch. I am more than happy to forward this on to you. It is in 4 parts. 2 parts are relaxation and the other 2 parts are basically positive affirmations being repeated over and over again. Obviously the more you listen to the CD the better chance there is of it working. Like with any of these things i always say... it's worth a try!

I have said before that i am a fan of Dr Weekes, her books and her recordings. I have a 4 part recording with Dr Weekes talking about Anxiety and Agoraphobia and how she thinks it should be dealt with. I felt full of hope and excitment the first time i listened as Dr Weekes explains that no matter how severe your anxiety, or how long you have had your problems, you CAN beat it.

I have often heard of the Linden Method as a way to cure panic attacks and anxiety. U have even spoken to someone who claimed it worked on them. The Linden Method if avaiable online but is expensive to buy. Once again i have these recordings on my computer, including the manual and all that comes with it.

Finally i have a book called 'Panic Away'. Like all i have mentioned before this book is avaiable online at a price.

I am listing these recordings here as each of them have success stories behind them and it may be the one that works for you. I can't comment on them all as yet as i am still working with the 'Think Right Now' recordings. But i am more than happy to forward any of these recordings on to anyone who wishes to give them a try.

Homelife.... well it's ok. My mum is getting concerned about my hermit behaviour, which makes me feel guilty. I had the kids most of last week so that kept me busy. Luke is continuing to recover from his operation and its 99% better. Chris and i are great, he makes me happy and i love when he is here... i do still worry that he is gonna get bored of me soon though. All i can do is continue to make an effort so he can see i am at least trying! He is taking a week off from work in May and plans to devote that week to helping me. He wants us to go out in the car and try to drive past my safety limit. He realises it will be tough and we will be going back and forward most of the time but its great that hes willing to try.

Anyway i feel like i am rambling now. I hope that everyone is in good spirits. Sorry i am not inspiring people with news of an amazing recovery but i wrote this blog to tell the truth and i don't think it would be realistic to be cured over night. Once again feel free to email me if you want any of the recordings or for any other reason at all.


Robert said...

Sorry things aren't going so well for you at the moment. Hopefully it's just a blip & you'll be on the road to recovery soon!

♥ Bookworm ♥ said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Bookworm said...

Sorry to hear that things are rather difficult for you at the moment. Anyone who has or is experiencing anxiety and agoraphobia knows that it won't go away overnight. The great thing is that you are committed to keep working on it! You can do it...each person just has to do it in their own time and what is right for them. (((HUGS)))

Rachael Hale said...

Hi lynn
Sorry to hear things are not that good at the moment, but im sure things will pick up soon. I hope they do. These blips are horrible, im getting over one at the moment, but i think there inevitable when your trying to recover.
Take care!

sweetmonster said...

I'm trying to remain optimistic. Like you, I don't want this to be my life. I do basically what you do during the day except I'm in my living room on the couch. I feel safe inside but I look at photos online of places I want to go. There are so many things I want to do out there. I'm actually pretty determined to get out of this before the summer is over. Then again, I've set that kind of goal every month. I just can't see myself living like this forever.

I feel guilty too. But I can see my parents are happy when I'm happy and talkative.

I have major ups and downs. Two weeks ago I tried meditation with the help of some podcasts I found on itunes and I felt calmer. But then I gave up. I guess I have to try it again.

Becca said...

Great post. It has interesting points regarding
panic attacks.Learn how to control panic attacks and other useful prevention methods at It can help you in many ways.

Zathyn Priest said...

I don't suffer from agoraphobia but I have battled severe social anxiety since I was a child. Sometimes it does feel like one step forward and then several steps backwards. But you're actively trying to overcome this and that in itself is a huge step.

I got myself a dog recently and one of the main reasons I did was so I'd have to take her out for walks. Being a greyhound, rarely do we not encounter ppl who want to come up and ask me about her. Given that, I'm starting to get used to chatting with strangers, something which has always caused anxiety.

We do the best we can and sometimes we have a breakthrough. It certainly sounds like you're giving it your best shot and not allowing it to rule you completely.

Best Wishes,

Tashi said...

Hi Lynn. Perhaps it is good and natural for sensitive personality types to spend a month in bed (or bedroom) every now and then ??? Maybe we even have some sort of unconscious need to hibernate that gets triggered in us from time to time ???

For myself, I do find that a few weeks of double-dose, hermit-like isolation every few months feels like a healthful thing to do. Maybe 2 or 3 times a year. It sort-of recharges my batteries, refreshes my interest in the outside world. It lets a bit of money build up in the piggybank too!

Yo Merita said...

oh, I understand you so well... I have felt like these for 13 years. I have had better moments, however, depending on the medicine I take.
I came to live to Canada 3 years ago and of course the stress of moving, being away from my family, new life, different language, had a bad effect on the agoraphobia and anxiety. Right now I feel like at the beginning, I barely go out and like you love to be at home but there is a life waiting for us out there...
Right now I`m trying a new medicine (I don`t like to take medicines, but it seems that for now it`s my only option) and also CBT , but so far it hasn`t worked much for me. I know I have to change my lifestyle to get the best out of the treatment. I highly recommend you a book named: `The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook` it is great.
Cheer up! :) we will get better, I`m sure...

Grasshopper said...

Hi, i´m from portugal and i´m 19 years old. Like you I have been battling anxiety and agoraphobia for the past 3 years. In the beggining it was a major problem because i´m attending an university that is about 50 km away from home (I have to catch a bus, the subway, etc...). I also began avoiding going out with my friends, something I always loved to do.

The main reason i´m writing this in here is to tell you my toughts and progresses with agoraphobia and panic. I stopped having panic attacks since I was able to fight them, just like that. When I was in the middle of one I thought "go ahead, I want the worst you can do" and the truth is that they began to back away very quickly.

Conquering agoraphobia has been a slower process but a possible one indeed. I´m still fighting it... My "little trick" is to do everything i´m afraid of, like going to a restaurant or to the supermarket. Lifting my head up high, getting a deep breath and entering a 3 hours lab class (for example) proved to be something easy and did real progresses to my life. The main point in this approach is that you never think in going back, the road is only in front.

I do know that sometimes WE don´t have the will and the strength to fight it back and it´s a lot easier to avoid it and hang around at home, making up excuses for not going out, but believe me when I say that the joy of being capable to do something you weren´t able to ,pays it back a thousand times.

I don´t believe in pills, therapists, self-help books or tapes (and i´ve tried them), I am truly certain that everyone has the key for beating this inside themselves.

Sorry for the length of the comment and the bad english, but I know that is reconforting to discover new points of view about this condition and sometimes it could be very helpful. Have strength and please get better!

monchi2175 said...

I really would like to try the Linden Method if you can forward it to PLEASE...I'm Desperate.

Jami said...

Hey there,

I stumbled across your blog from a mess of links online, lol and its the first thing ive read and actually been able to relate too. I have been stuck in my house for almost a year now, and i cant seem to leave my saftey zone, which is my back yard, and maybe 10 feet from my front door. If you can send me any info or help in any way at all, id really really appreciate it!! I need my life back! :)

Sharae020 said...


I have been suffering with panic attacks and anxiety for a long time and I am so tired of it I have tried antidepressants and benzo's and i hate them both. I had a bad experince with zoloft which scared me from taking any kind of medication.. I need some help i can't afford to buy the linden method and I almost lost my fiance twice over this anxity thing. I am going through a lot of stuff right now. If anyone can help me out with the lendin method it would help me a lot. Thanks my email is

Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

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Anonymous said...

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