Thursday, 16 April 2009

3rd Driving Lesson

look how much i had to zoom out!

Today I had my third driving lesson. I didn't want to go. I was dreading it and as the time of the lesson drew closer i was ready to cancel it. Archie, my instructor, has told me that i NEED to go to another town to learn more driving. My village is too easy and i need to learn to deal with driving on busier roads, junctions etc.


I knew that when i seen Archie today he would want me to travel way out of my comfort zone. I wasn't ready. but i managed to convince myself to go through with it. I would at least speak to Archie and explain how i was feeling instead of running away and avoiding facing up to this. Running away from life is exactly how i ended up with agoraphobia.


When Archie arrived I got into the passenger seat and had a bit long rant. But Archie wasn't listening. He continued to drive with me until I was at my furthest point. I explained that I was getting way too uncomfortable and that, if i had to, i would jump out of the moving car if he didn't stop. Does that sound dramatic? Have any of you ever considered this? I really believe i would do this if someone continued to drive me against my will lol. Thankfully Archie pulled over and let me get in the driver' seat. Once i had control of the car my anxiety reduced a little. But wanting to challenge my, Archie asked me to drive further than usual. I did it. I don't know if you will remember a post i did a while ago and I talked about places on the road to Gerry's house. The Garage, McDonald's, Asda. Well today i hit every one of those targets. Not literally! I didn't crash into them, but i drove past them and even beyond them. At first we hit a series of round abouts which Archie told me to drive through. Well i shouted and moaned and said no, i wanted to turn back... but eventually i done as i was told. My panic subsided. We drove to PAISLEY... yes PAISLEY where Gerry lives, and the point i most want to reach, but never thought i would. Feeling like i had gone far enough we headed back and then i done it all over again.


Then we headed out in the other direction and before i knew it I had driven through another 2 towns. I sat at the furthest point and thought to myself 'LOOK WHERE YOU ARE' but like i have said before, i don't think it really sunk in. The most mental thing is that i was pretty much completely calm. To get home i was taken onto the duel carriageway where i drove at 70mph. He told me to take the slip road back to my town but i continued and drove all the way to Glasgow Airport. When i missed the turn off for my village i got a bit stressed again. I realised that I was doing 70, and that for quite a bit of road there was nowhere to stop and no where to turn. Now that i was heading to the airport there was no turning back. But somehow i just thought 'Well i better just do it'.


I sit here in disbelief. Next lesson Tuesday

11 comments:

alice said...

truly amazing. doesnt it make a difference when your concentrating on something else? and with driving you really have to concentrate. well done.

Lynn said...

Yes i totally agree. I notice i dont even like the driving as much if im in the passanger seat. but once im in control i calm down. concentrating on driving is a great distraction! Best thing i ever done

Robert said...

Absolutely f*****g brilliant!!!!!! See you, you're a star! Next week you'll be driving down the M6 to see Marie at home.

.....well, maybe not next week!

Jason said...

Wow! That's quite the driving instructor.

I'm so proud of you lynn and totally inspired.

Nechtan said...

Great stuff Lynn. You must be chuffed to bits. The car could be the best thing that has happened to you in years and will give you that bit of independance you need to get where you want to go.

Well done,

Nechtan

Mr. Blue said...

I'm proud of you! Keep the inspiration coming.

Lynn said...

People say its inspiring. I suppose i think that if i can do this, anyone can. I really thought i had the worst case of agoraphobia. I know thats a bit self centred but it was bad. I didnt see a way out and really thought id be spending life indoors. But these past few months i have suprised myself and i honestly believe if i can do this anyone can, so i am even more keen to get out there if i give anyone hope. Thanks loads for your comments. It helps more than you know!

Mia Patch said...

Your third driving lesson actually went well. You may have missed one turn but it was nothing major. Congratulations! Remember, it’s okay to be afraid but the thought of something that’s much more essential than fear, can make you overcome whatever lies ahead. ;)

Johnson said...

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Marvis Carswell said...

Don’t let fear put you down! It’s okay to be nervous and all on your first to third driving lessons, but be sure to get over that feeling on the following days or tries. Remember, you have to be confident while you’re driving!

Mia Patch said...

Driving out of your comfort zone – this is probably your first step to overcoming your phobia. Of course it wouldn't happen overnight, but this is such a big step and congratulations for that! I hope by now you're way comfortable to drive around places which you've once considered dangerous. Mia Patch@RookieDriver.co.uk